“4 Tips for a Long-Lasting Gay Marriage” for DatingAdvice.com

Newly engaged and married couples often spend blissful months gazing happily into each other’s eyes and cruising from one romantic experience to another. But once the honeymoon is over, the real work begins.

You and your husband may have had fun going on dates or maybe even living together, but things can change when it’s a marriage and not a dating relationship. It’s a thrilling new chapter, and it can present challenges, regardless of your age, background, or sexual orientation.

My grandparents were married for many decades, and I found it inspiring to see how successful they were. They understood each other. They discussed everything and came to a mutual agreement. Their love seemed so pure, romantic, and endearingly memorable. It’s what every newly married couple hopes to achieve, yet few actually make it there.

Here are my top four tips to make sure your gay marriage stays strong through the years.

1. Establish Relationship Rules 

Every lasting relationship is based on mutual expectations. Are you monogamous or polyamorous? Are you adventurous or homebodies? What do you like to do for fun together? Every married couple creates their own rules.

During my matchmaking career, I met many men who tried to save their relationship by making it an open relationship. I believe that type of tactic only exacerbates the real issues and perpetuates an imbalance. One person will eventually feel uncomfortable or lose trust in his partner. If you want to make a polyamorous relationship work, you need to establish those rules early on — not months or years into monogamy

Your marriage will be stable and long-lasting if you stay firm to the commitments you made and the habits of love you’ve shown from the beginning. Never assume a married partner is happy with an open relationship. Keep open lines of communication as well. We’re human beings, and we can be sensitive creatures when it comes to sex.

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